if you like me you must not know who I am
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Dick very happy bro
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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