fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
