she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
