it wasn't lemon gatorade
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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