I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
