Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
