why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
