dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
