i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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