I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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