never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
