Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
