I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
