just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
