I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
