I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
