i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Randomize