The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
