Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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