Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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