I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
