What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
