so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
