Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Randomize
