Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize