Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
