Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Non-Jews are for practice
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
