I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Randomize
