Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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