Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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