you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
