i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
