Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize