i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
be right there i have to get my cape
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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