i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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