It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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