So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
