Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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