I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
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