just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
