i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
