do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
