What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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