HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
