Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
