I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I am mentally ready for anal.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
