Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He has the fingertips of a God
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