I want to stick my p in your. b.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
The power of my boobs compel you
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
