He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize