dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
